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Our air conditioner has been out for the past three days. I feel like I’m about to melt. Thankfully the repair guy is coming out tomorrow but sweet holy moly it’s been a sauna in my apartment. At a ripe (and I do mean ripe) steady 85 degrees with absolutely no air flow except for the office which has a ceiling fan, I’m pretty sure I’ve lost a few pounds in sweat alone. (I haven’t been weighing myself daily though, opting for weekly monitoring instead.)

I’ve been hanging around the house in my little exercise shorts that I wear under my skirts to keep my legs from rubbing, topped with the lightest weight t-shirts I can find. Since doing things like laundry and dishes result in needing to change clothing down to my under garments, not a lot has gotten done. And, nothing better to keep you from exercising than the heat.

My skinny fit husband has been taking it in stride. He’s hot, he admits it, but he doesn’t sweat as much and he doesn’t feel quite as overwhelmed by it as I do. Thankfully, we have the pool to help cool down but there’s only so much time you can spend in a community pool before people start looking oddly at your wrinkled flesh, asking themselves if you really live there or if you’re just some homeless person who’s hopped the fence.

The rest of the time I’ve been sitting on a blow up mattress (where my husband and I have been sleeping at night) in my office under the ceiling fan, trying to get some work done but failing miserably. The heat is definitely throwing me off my game.

Fortunately, when you’re hot you don’t want to eat much. Unfortunately, you don’t want to move much either. I have taken a temporary break from my 100 crunch mania and whilst in the pool I’ve found it harder and harder to do any sort of lap, resigning to just kick-board around the pool until my husband drags me out and brings me home before the neighbors call the cops.

We’ve been trying to stay out of the house some but this has meant we’ve eaten out two days in a row – Panera Bread Co. and Chipotles. I’ve felt pretty unhealthy and pretty stagnant and well… really self-critical and cranky. Bad habits do lead to more bad habits though because I’ve gotten the taste of laziness and restaurant food and now?… that sounds good… I’ve thought (fleetingly and philosophically) “why am I doing this again!?” – no good, right!

So today I picked myself up (or rather my husband did when I refused to get up from the air mattress this morning with a “why should I get up when all I’m going to do today is sweat, get nauseated, and feel miserable”) got dressed up, curled my hair, and went out to a movie.

While sitting, waiting for The Dark Night Rises to begin, I thought about how differently my husband and I deal with things like heat, depression, and even commitment. I wish I was a bit more like him sometimes when it comes to these types of things. He can shake things off so much better than I can and he is one of the most committed and rational people I’ve ever met – I admire him a great deal.

I think I can learn from him a lot but I know I’ll never be just like him… I wouldn’t be me then and that’s no good too. But I can try to boost my self confidence by being more rational and slightly less emotional (moderation is the key after all, right?) and refusing to succumb to anti-productive thoughts of giving up by honoring my commitment no matter how much of a struggle it might be.

I did my 100 crunches tonight as a pledge to myself (heat be damned) and as a small personal triumph and step back on the path. And, I’ve already set my alarm to go swimming in the morning for fitness AND fun. Fricking heat, I’ll show you who’s in charge!